WRITING FRIENDS IN PRISON

To know that someone...

2012-01-16T14:26:00.000-08:00

To know that someone loves you
to know that someone does care
Is enough to bring comfort
when life seems so unfair
No matter what the trouble
love can ease the pain
It soothes the hurt
keeping a person sane
It`s that knowing
that gives strength and hope
for in knowing we are loved
we are able to cope
When you love someone
Showing them that you care
it brings them comfort
when life seems so unfair
When two people love eachother
Showing that they care
Its the greatest comfort
Beyond compare

Harold Lee -- January 9. 2012

Looking for a penpal in Europe!

2011-12-30T14:31:00.000-08:00

Danny is looking for a penpal, someone who will keep him company by letters...
He is a musician, a singer and has been an entertainer for quite a few years .
He is 49.
And would like to write to men or women...

Currently incarcerated at the Powledge Unit in Palestine, TX

Thanks ....he really would love to receive your letter!!

Daniel Wells
# 1486903
Powledge Unit
1400 FM 3452
Palestine, TX 75803
USA

Merry Christmas 2011

2011-12-22T07:05:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY & HEALTHY 2012!!

Penpal for Jack

2011-12-19T07:00:00.000-08:00

Posting this for Jack Friend, who would like to have a penpal:

POEM - For The Sake of Love

For the sake of love you can help me, for I am so lost and all alone without someone to be in love with and in love with the idea of being in love!

I once was in love, and I once was in love with the idea of being in love, but . . .

I was young and dumb and did not know if I was in love, or if I was just in love with the idea of being in love. The answer was painfully learned over the passage of time to be that if I was in love then I must have also been in love with the idea of being in love. For is not being in love with the idea of being in love a part of being in love? It matters not now that I did not know then. If I was in love? Or in love with the idea of being in love? For both the love from before and the love of the idea of being in love are long since gone along with the one that I was in love with, and in love with the idea of being in love with.

For the sake of love can you help me? For since they have left me so all alone and loveless for so long with only the sorrowful memories of being in love, and being in love with the idea of being in love . . .

I am constantly wondering from day to day and throughout the lonely nights . . .

If everyone else can find someone else to be in love with, and in love with the idea of being in love with . . .

Will I ever be in love with someone else again? And will I ever become in love with the idea of being in love with someone else again?

For the sake of Love can you help me, to find someone else to be in love with, and in love with the idea of being in love with, who will be in love with me, and in love with the idea of being in love with me?

For the sake of love can you help me, for I am so lost and all alone without someone to be in love with , and in love with the idea of being in love with!

For the Sake of Love Can You Help Me?

I have invested every dime I had in internet ads, as I would like to have a penpal.

Haven`t gotten many responces yet but hope to find someone to visit me. Maybe even a grilfriend who knows?

I mainly want to find friends though....

Jack W. Friend #H-39500 San Quentin Prison San Quentin, CA 94974-0002

Just a quote....

2011-10-06T15:44:00.001-07:00

"Some people think only intellect counts: knowing how to solve problems, knowing how to get by, knowing how to identify an advantage and seize it. But the functions of intellect are insufficient without courage, love, friendship, compassion and empathy."

- Dean Koontz

I am not the man....

2011-10-03T16:04:00.000-07:00

TRIBUTE TO TROY DAVIS

Events of the Italian Coalition Against the Death Penalty

2011-10-03T04:00:00.000-07:00

The Italian Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty (NPO) was founded in Naples in 1997.

Our vision : A world where human rights and needs are respected.

Our mission: To educate and raise public awareness of respect of all human beings.

Our motto : Together We Will Win!

The association's goal is to provide news and information to the Italian and International community on human rights, legal and social issues and primarily on the use of capital punishment worldwide. Its founders have proper educational backgrounds and expertise and have been dedicating their time and efforts to the cause for many years.

We pay particular attention to the situation in the United States of America, being the only Western democracy that still applies the death penalty as a means of punishment.

Our opposition to the death penalty is unconditional, as we are convinced that the respect of human rights be an unquestionable top priority and that justice cannot be pursued by taking revenge, but by conducting the forces operating in society in a just and well-balanced way.

Each community must be in a position to assure its members certainty of punishment and above all equitable and rightful legal proceedings, but it also has to enable offenders to rehabilitate themselves – whenever possible – thus balancing the legitimate need for justice for the families of the victims of violent crime, and the respect of the very same values which demand an act of justice. The imposition of the death penalty negates modern concepts of penology which are based on the theory that rehabilitation of the individual criminal is possible.

We are in direct contact with several men and women sitting on death in the USA as well as in other countries.

Our educational activities are being held mainly in schools and universities, religious and lay associations, and within groups / organizations that work in defense of human rights. As our target audience is mainly composed of young people, we mostly use the Internet as a way of communication.

In Italy we work with the Sant’Egidio Community, Hands Off Cain, Amnesty International, as well as any other groups, associations and individuals who share our same principles and goals. We are founding members of the World Coalition Against the Death Penalty through which we help develop protest campaigns at an International level.

We provide news through our mailing list which is updated on a daily basis; Furthermore a great deal of useful information, bibliography and filmography on such topics as well as rules and advice on how to correspond with a death row prisoner can be found in our web-site.

The Coalition members, besides being all volunteers full of goodwill, are bound by a strong friendship and respect. We believe that there is strength in numbers and that working together is the winning strategy thanks to which we shall reach the final goal, that is the abolition of the death penalty and the respect for the rule of law worldwide.

Coalition website: www.coalit.it

Upcoming events:

World Day Against the Death Penalty 2011

Piacenza (9th October): Conference/Debate on capital punishment organized by Amnesty International Italia - Gruppo Giovani Piacenza in cooperation with Spazio2

Expert speaker: Arianna Ballotta, President of the Italian Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty

Cities for Life 2011

Naples (30th November): Conference on capital punishment organized by the Italian Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty in cooperation with the Community of Sant'Egidio and the association Sacco & Vanzetti

Speakers (among others):

- Michela Mancini and Arianna Ballotta, respectively Vice-President and President of the Italian Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty

- Hon. Luigi De Magistris, Mayor of Naples

- Hon. Antonio di Pietro,former anti-corruption magistrate and leader of the opposition Italy of Values party

- Fernanda Sacco and Matteo Marolla, respectively Honorary President and President of the association Sacco & Vanzetti

- Mario Marazziti of the Community of Sant'Egidio

-David Atwood founder of the Texas Coalition to Abolish the Death Penalty

Why hypocrite? ... by Mitchell Mavoides

2011-09-28T14:54:00.000-07:00

"Hypocrisy - n. behavior in which a person pretends to have higher standards than is the case. Origin Greek " hupokrisis", " acting of a theatrical part." ( Source: Oxford Dictionary of Current English fourth ed.)

That is what hypocrisy is, when we act like we hold to an ethic we really don`t practice. How often do we see it in here?
How about when we see a bully on the wing take something from a little guy and gloat about it?
Then he gets shaken down by the officers and cries to high heaven about the injustice of them taking something he wasn`t even supposed to have. He wants his rights to private property respected, but he doesn`t respect that with others` valuables. Why?

The hypocrisy we have all seen in here like that - about rights - has gotten on all our nerves at least once or twice. Let me put emphasis on us in white for a moment, because how we acted is how we got here. To make it simple, when you violate others` rights, you forfeit your own. That`s why we`re in prison - we`ve all done this to some degree. Many of us still don`t get it.
Why are these rights to be respected?

"Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."
We have all heard of these rights. Why do we have them?
Most prisoners - myself included for a while - really don`t know. As I`ve found out, they are necessary for people to live and thrive in a fee society. Prison culture has predictably and ignorantly reversed them.

Life is the essential right. Human life is of irreplaceable value, each one percious and unique. But in the prison culture, many think a human`s life is worthless and have the skulls, demons and degraded imagery tattooed on them to prove it. " A dozen livers for a dime." is the view.
Why?
Liberty is the freedom to say what you will ( as long as you aren`t threatening others) and think what you want. These two freedoms lead to critical analyses, discussions and innovations. They make life better by making it more open to reason. But in prison, certain tyrannical inmates want to silence others if the person says something the other doesn`t like. He displays his wounded pride and in the name of respect, he is ready to fight`.
Can`t he use words to deal with it like a rational person?

The pursuit of happiness, as I understand it, is the right to follow the work you enjoy, to earn the values you need to live and to achieve happiness by reaching your goals. But inside these walls, some think being a "jacker" is a legitimate job. Let`s be real; being a robber isn`t a real job. If you think it is, then your rights will continue to be taken away.
If we can think, use our hands and produce goods, then why do we have a robber attitude when it comes to other people`s things - things others have worked hard for?

I know rights are limited these days - especially in prison. We need to understand that these rights stem from aspects of human nature; from man as a thinking, feeling, productive human being. The founding fathers of our country thought them so obvious that they called them "self-evident" in the Declaration of Independence.

We need to stop being hypocrites and respect the rights of other people. Forget the prison culture because, if we don`t we will continue to sabotage ourselves. We need to flush the " survival of the fittest" mentality, and then maybe we won`t come back.
We aren`t living in the Old West anymore, despite ow much I`ve heard about the desire to return to it.
We don`t live in a society of men forming gangs for mutual protection, of lynch-mob justice or six-gun showdowns in the street at high noon.
We live in a society of individual rights and freedoms that deserve to be respected.
Fact-based courts should pass judgement and settle disputes instead of fists and gun muzzles.

Let`s face reality: we must respect each other`s rights.
Regardless of whether it is a big, strong warrior, a physically weak guy, a woman or a child, we all have the right to live free. If you can`t agree with that, for whatever reason, you`ll hear the iron doors slam.
Don`t ask yourself, "Why?" because you know why...

Mitchel Mavoides, Robertson Unit,
The Echo Prison Newspaper...September 2011

Another day...by Samantha McCallister

2011-09-28T08:14:00.000-07:00

Another day...

Shackles around my feet

Even a convict can`t take this much heat

Grey and white is all I see

In this 6x9, I begin to discover me

Was once lost in a dark world,
drowning the pain.

Reality, grabbing me by the throat.
Screaming: are you insane?

We all have a story that eventually unfolds.

Fighting with demons, for the souls we have sold.

Sleep with one eye open,

Barely sleep at all.

Pick up the phone,
but who will ever accept your call?

Ones who stood behind you,
have slowly faded away.

So much time to think

but so little left to say.

Few know their out dates,
for when they will leave.

Others have their faith,
in God to believe.

Spiritually inclined,
but seeking the light.

Struggling with darkness,
putting up a fight.

Doors slam, lights dimm.

Awaiting another day, to pay for our sins.

Samantha McCallister
Woodman Unit, Texas

What are we?...by Steven " Dutch" Waller

2011-09-28T08:07:00.000-07:00

What are we?

What is it that shapes a man`s life? Is it heredity? Is it his environment? Or is it some unknown element produced by a certain time or place and conditions that will shape a man to meet it?
A change in a man is never so evident to himself, but ofcourse we experience new things daily. Even as a man will shape somethings with his hands, he`s also shapeing himself.
A man has in himself a material that can be shaped into anything he wishes to be. The problem of this is that the shaping never ceases, and sometimes we get carried away and go too far in one direction before we realize it was the wrong direction.

We start out in life with the best of intentions, but the best intentions in the world get a man nowhere unless he knows how to get results and can enlist the cooperation of others.
Cooperation means that we must compromise. compromise is not a dirty word. In fact, it`s the cornerstone of civilization, just as politics is the art of making civilization work.
Those men who are not willing to compromise are unwise and are left standing alone with their own principles and values. Meanwhile, other men adjust their differences and move on.

Soetimes we, as men, have dreams and expectations. We ourselves are not ready for those dreams, and we must grow to meet them. What we want out of the world, we feel ourselves able to get.

The problem is shaping the raw material that is within ourselves; shaping our strengths, our weaknesses and our way of thinking into the final product we can all respect.

Steven "Dutch" Waller, Bodge Unit, Texas

Words from Harold,

2011-09-27T04:04:00.000-07:00

...
For a man in prison, friends and family tend to fade away, thoughts of those we knew or loved often drive a man to depression. To overcome this, many will bitch, gripe and complain about anything and everything. Why?
Its away to push our former lives, and loved ones, out of our minds, easing the pain of our loneliness and what we are missing?
To some affected thusly, normal conversation is a constant state of agony over whatever they perceive as wrong, whether it is or not....

letter from Sept, 19 - 2011

its been so long

2011-08-31T15:16:00.001-07:00

Its been so long since I have shared with you poems and writings on this blog...
soon I will be updating again..

thanks for your patience

Angela

Journey of Hope...From Violence to Healing Blog: "Marietta's Song" has won TEN DAYS STRAIGHT

2011-03-06T03:54:00.000-08:00

Journey of Hope...From Violence to Healing Blog: "Marietta's Song" has won TEN DAYS STRAIGHT

When I die

2011-03-02T11:08:00.000-08:00

When I die, passing from this life to whatever lies beyond. My body will turn to ash in the fires of a crematorium. Those ashes will fill a box, probably of a paper construction, such as cardboard, but what then?

Aside from someone, or no one, claiming that box, and its contents, what will happen to me, or rather the memory thereof?

Will time itself have already faded thoughts of my existence from the minds of those who once knew me, or of me? Will I be remembered, other than on official documents, themselves forgotten in some obscure file tucked away in a dark dungeon of a building, or no longer used computer system, both being considered out of date and obsolete. If anyone should recall thoughts of me, what would those thoughts be? The good I have accomplished, such as written words or artful endeavours? Possibly the bad I have caused, like the pain and anguish I was once responsible for. Perhaps the joy I once brought or the smiles formed by my presence?

Would anyone of my former lovers recall the passion of our being together, however brief? A person lives on, only so long as they are remembered. Once thoughts pass from the mind of the last living person who knew of me, I will surely fade quickly from having ever existed. If my ashes survive, not being scattered or flushed away, and one who knows not what they are, discovers them, will they be treated reverently, as coming from a former human being, or will they be considered as just an accumulation of the past to be discarded? If in some distant future, a person should come across my name, after having discovered and curiously investigated whatever contained it, would they sit back and wonder, who was he?

Will they, or, will they let their eyes pass over the printed name considering them, those characters on paper, merely just letters amongst others on the page?
Will it really matter, once I am no longer living, whether I am remembered or not?

Does it matter now, even though I have life coursing through my veins?

I think, yes, to a few, but not to the rest, including even many who knew me as a living, breathing person. Once a person is removed from the life, the existence shared with others, that person is soon forgotten, as I will be, as I already am, though I still live.

Death is not to be feared. Death brings an end to life, good or bad, as we know it, yet it is also a gateway to whatever may exist, if it indeed does, beyond that threshold death presents, when I die.

Harold, February 18, 2011

Looking for a penpal

2011-02-14T10:14:00.001-08:00

Christian Olsen, really would like to have some people who could write to him...if you have the time, please write a few lines.

Christian Olsen
# 999546
TDCJ Polunsky Unit
3872 FM 350 South
...Livingston, TX 77351
U.S.A.See more

A verse

2011-02-12T10:38:00.000-08:00

Too stoned to remember
too high to forget
I`ve known you girl
Since the day we met
`Far as I can tell
There`s nothing to regret
I`m not one to complain
You ain`t one to fret
We just keep on keepin` on
Together we`re a safe bet
Couple more tokes
Will be set
Gettin` high to remember
what I`m trying to forget....

H. Lee, Feb.2, 2011

Growin` old...

2011-02-12T10:34:00.000-08:00

Listenin` to the music
That classic rock`n`roll
Been rockin` my socks off
Till I realized
My feet were cold
Used to dance to the music
Shake, rattle n` roll
When I threw out my back
I finally realized
It hurts gettin` old
Drinkin` and drugs
Partyin` all the time
Bottles lined up on the table
Then I realized
It`s medication they now hold
Ah,the memories
Livin` it all again in dreams
Days of glory fade away
When you realize
It`s sad growin` old
I`m still rockin`
Only now it`s in a chair
Still listenin` to loud music
But only cuz I can`t hear
Just thinkin` about it I have to smile
Cuz I realized
I`ve had fun, growin` old

H. Lee -- Jan. 31, 2011

Taken 4 granted

2011-01-08T11:34:00.000-08:00

taken for granted

How often do we go through the day at a hundred miles an hour? We wake up, get ready for work or school, don`t stop, don`t slow down because we don`t want to be late.
You may even skip lunchbreak due to excessive work given to you by your boss. You work, and work hard all day long.
Once finally off work you come home eat dinner, maybe watch TV and then go to bed - only to get up the next day to do it all over again.
During this robotic-like routine what are we missing?
The sunrise. The newly bloomed flowers in the garden, the cool autumn breeze against your face, or maybe just sitting down for a few minutes to have a cup of coffee and read the paper. On even just putting the dishes away from the night before or folding warm, fresh laundry.
Things we may do without a moments thought.
What if it is all pulled out from under you and never allowed the most simpliest of choices?
Would you be happy?
Relieved of the hassel?
I guess you can never truly be able to comprehend untill its all gone from you...
What about a pillow? How often do you think about your pillow on your bed? Could you sleep without one? I mean why would we on normal circumstances even think about it?
Again, untill you don`t have one do you truly understand the neccesity it is to sleep with a pillow.
Or how about a shower...
What if you were only allowed to shower on certain days or at certain times, could you do it?
Do you ever think about not being able to take a shower?
Of course not, why would you?

All these things or tasks we think little or nothing about on a normal, regular basis. Yet its all yout thnk about when you have nothing.
I never liked going to work, doing the dishes or laundry, and never seemed to slow down to "stop and smell the roses"., but now that I can`t, I wish I could!
The saying: " You never know what you got till its gone" seems to come to mind.
WHat does it all mean for you when it all comes down to it? Life will sometimes be good and sometimes be bad. There will be ups and downs.
Sometimes the days will go slow or speed by. But NEVER take anything for granted!

Christian Olsen

Interview with Tion Terrell

2010-11-12T09:37:00.001-08:00

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/ibthewise1/2010/11/11/supaman-scribes-w-i-b-wise

THis is an excellent interview with Tion Terrell, an ex-inmate, spent time in prison for 10 years...please listen!!!

Ten things most missed about the free world -- by Ralph Stokes

2010-10-31T10:51:00.000-07:00

1. Freedom being able to go and do whatever you wanted.

2. My family; father, mother, brothers, and sister, who is the youngest of all children. Just being around them daily and all the small things we think that`s not important. Me being the oldest of them and feeling it was my responsibility to look over them.

3. My mother and her cooking, who knew exactly how to cook everything just the way I like it to the point where if I was eating someone else`s cooking, if it wasn`t cooked the way my mother cooked, then it was cooked wrong.

4. Giving my Grandmother a surprise visit and remembering just as I turn the corner to her block that she lived on, I could see her before she saw me, sitting on her inside porch looking out in the evening as the sun was going down and remembering as I was getting closer to her house, wondering what was had cooked for dinner.

5. family get-together`s and cookouts getting together with family members you may not have seen all year long and some even longer, and those you may not see again until the next family get-together or cookout.

6. coming out of my house and standing on my front steps and looking both ways, up and down the block, and seeing all the children busy in their playing with each other and not a worry in the world.

7. My baby Sister who at the time I was arrested was about 1,5 year old, who is now around 30 years old, and missing out on this time to be there for her like a big brother should. Also my youngest brother who at the time of my arrest was only 10 years old, who I felt that me and him was the closest of my brothers.
He also was murdered in the year 2000 on my birthday February 8th.

8. Whenever I had a problem or something on my mind and just needed to get away for a couple of hours to be by myself. I would take long walks, sometimes to the park, and take my dog Brutus with me, and before I knew it, whatever problems that I had on my mind were gone.

9. At least one or two Saturdays every month my mother and aunt would get together early in the morning to go shopping, which would take them all day long to do, and how they would make me and my cousin go with them to carry the bags, and remembering how me and my cousin never wanted to go with them, but they made us go anyway. Also remembering at times how we used to try and hide somewhere, but how they used to always find us.

10. Walking up every day and not thinking or worrying about death row and whether or not I`ll ever get off death row.

Ralph, Oct 4. 2010

Thoughts

2010-10-09T08:27:00.000-07:00

I am charged with murder. First degree was brought up but never placed on paper.
Am I guilty? Yes, I am.
Would I do it again? Given the same situation? Hmm, never will we know, will we?
I want to say "yes", but I also want to say "no".
Do I regret what I did? No, I do not.
I do regret the pain and sufferingmy deed cause so many.
The victims family, my own family, especially my daughter, for the latter I will never forgive myself. Never.
You may think I`m harsh or worse. You may wonder why. It`s sîmple really, a trust was broken, a childs world was defiled by greed, a friendship was betrayed. Forgiveness was present for awhile but the victim ( me or her?) refused to admit and continued to deny what was done. It went too far. I ended it in rage.
Now I have a lifetime to think about it all, yet I do not regret what I did. In ending that persons life, I put a stop to a future of betrayal, deceit and theft from that person against my family and friends.
Extreme?
I think not.
When a person loses all in their checking account,savings, their credit is ruined, and regular bills are still due, all because of a so called friends betrayal, well it just needs to stop.
The police are powerless to act without solid proof. In my case justice was sewed, swift and sure.
I think it`s fritting that that same justice also caught me for my crime.
Now only one record on file, a memory and a tombstone remain.
Life goes on such as it is.

H.Lee Sept.30.2010

A moment of doubt

2010-10-09T08:11:00.000-07:00

I once tried to say I didn`t love you...
Well, it seems that it was a lie
Then I wanted to hate you
I failed again, oh my
I guess I wanted to test myself
To see if it was really true
There is nothing I`d rather be
Than in love with you
So it seems I was a liar
And a failure too
When I tried to test myself
Love came shining through
It all happened some time ago
A moment of doubt gone away
Now I shout to the world
I`ll love you forever and a day.

H.Lee Sept 30.2010

A new friend?

2010-09-28T13:15:00.000-07:00

Thanks is not enough.
Your lovely letter, your kind words, Your offering of support.
And even more importantly your offering of friendship.
Truly words cannot fully express ny appreciation and just how
honored you have made me feel.
This card is just a small token of my appreciation. So truly from my heart
Thanks for everything. And hopefully,
just maybe,
this will be the start of a new and big term friendship
between us.

Take care,
Ralph

Waynesburg, Pennsylvania

Ambitions -- Chris Corbin

2010-08-07T05:17:00.000-07:00

Ambitions swell my heart,
With no truthful place to explore,
Sun consumed by the dark…
Left abandoned by tides ashore.

Wit now truthful place to explore,
Sand flattens foam standing still,
Left abandoned by tides ashore
Waves withdraw feeling with its thrill.

Sand flattens foam standing still,
One by one, bubbles burst,
Waves withdraw fleeing with its thrill,
Why does hope hang uw with its curse?

One by one, bubbles burst,
Pressed by breezes wanting to know
Why does hope hang us with its curse?
Addicted to the rush of fantasy`s flow

Pressed by breezes wanting to know
Of the recipe stirring inside you
Addicted to the rush of fantasy`s flow
Camouflaged by the problems that divide you.

Of the recipe stirring inside of you,
Constantly thinking getting no stronger
Camouflaged by the problems that divide you,
Going on, when going is, no longer…

Constantly thinking getting no stronger,
Burrowing through life still behind on breath,
Going on, when going is, no longer…
Like a heartbeat itself to death.

Burrowing through life still behind on breath,
Questions come knocking on double locked doors,
Like a geartbeat beating itself to death,
Wanting one more chance, but answers ignored.

Questions come knocking on double locked doors,
Sun consumed by the dark,
Wanting one more chance but answers ignored,
Ambitions swell my heart.

Christopher Corbin
July 30
Connelly Unit, Kenedy

Kamikaze, come fly

2010-04-29T08:33:00.000-07:00

CHRISTOPHER: I wrote this after the 2nd convict hung himself here on my pod in a month March-April 2010.
--I thought the daily cocktails were so suppose to help them cope with that anxiety`s..not coax them into freeing themselves from them...
--It`s clear what the penitentiary is for, ..to store and not restore,...on must do this himself...
--Rehabilitation`s a joke, cause who`s to say you were "-habilitated" in the first place, to be "re-" anything...

KAMIKAZE, COME FLY...

With right constantly upon me,
and days deigning no rays,
just say how shall I see,
if my scars did not guide the way...

My sky is overcast with pain
like skid marks in soiled draws, I`m stained,
soul and spirit attempt divide,
at war...where wind and wing collide
didn`t get the note I needed
though the days still come unheeded,
encouraged by an urge within,
to hide my hurt and not give in,
uncertain if the curtain is closed,
where the way is lost no one knows...

Ref.

Searching past the vastest questions,
where from the blackness came a blessing,
addressed from where dilemmas stem,
always will life be filled with them,
lowered by the lingering things,
pacing as the pendulum swings
sneaking between my heart and mind
side by side yet too blind to find
the hostage on the horizon
a paralyzed sun tired of rising

Ref.

Kamikaze com fly
let gravity deny
the weight of my sorrow
repressing tomorrow...
trying to mold my hopes,
against itself like ropes,
leaving my regret,
suspended in a twist...
with blemish blent to bliss

Questions from Christian..

2010-04-12T05:28:00.000-07:00

Questions from Christian....

I wish I could take classes to further educate myself. Think about this: Why can an inmate serving a life sentence who will never get out be able to take classes in school but not Death Row? If neither is to get out then whats the difference?
This place wants to just put us in a cage and forget about us. I think of stuff like this.
Do you think thats weird?

--------Letter from April 1, 2010...Christian (21) is only but a year now on Death Row and still needs to get adjusted somehow...

Better man....

2010-04-03T03:00:00.001-07:00

It`s cold..and it`s dark and I`m all alone
stuck in this insanity so far from home
but I still stand,
and when I emerge
I`ll be a better man
Tear-stained letters is what I been receiving
I told her I`ve changed
but she don`t believe me
if only she knew...
How low I feel for the pain I`ve put the world through
confined to a box 24/7
I stopped praying long ago for there`s no proof of heaven
She say that "I`m crazy"
She say "talk to Him, He`ll make it gravy..."
She say "with Him all things is possible baley"
me...I just don`t believe it ---
You wouldn`t either if you see what they be feeding
You wouldn`t either if you were to see how they fuck us over and be cheating
You wouldn`t either if you woke up to hear them screaming....
There`s no politially motivated religion that can help me through what I`m living
just inner peace and the soul of a warrior that I`ve been given,
I am what I am,...a man rooted in reality
A man with both arms tied behind his back due to the creation of captivity,
but I still stand,
and when I emerge,
I`ll be a better man...

By: Tito T. Bolden
#1258742 @ Cy
899 FM 632
Kenedy, TX 78119
USA

your absence

2010-04-01T08:35:00.000-07:00

In your absence, I feel your presence
from the warmth you bring to my heart
Thoughts of you always on my mind
soulmates are never really ever apart
so though you are absent in my life
As I am in yours each day
we are bound together, each to the other
Present in our hearts, in our special way...

H.Lee march,11 - 2010

The days - by Chris

2010-03-13T04:33:00.000-08:00

The days come to me as breath to my lungs,
seeking rfuge, though refusing to stay...
a midnight lover brushing my body,
as dark clouds would passing a lonely moon,
screening paryers as secretaries would -
still the days come to me unappointed,
annointing me with its weight and pressure,
wach gesturing to be the one for me,
but I see pass their lust to own my soul...
Still do the days come, dressed by tempting suns,
a dime a dozen seeking a husband
in me, though my souldmate has been declared.
For her shall I wait to recieve true love,
refusing the moment, with no omens
open romances or second chances -
should I fail my maiden of circumstance...
if only...
her sisters wouldn`t crowd and overwhelm,
with their promises of second-hand love...
wandering in wonder of her ideal,
stolen sessions with her sweet secretions,
smilingin relief from the grief I feel...
prayers of freedom breathe a priceless breeze,
dates of unstressed doubt - no soul - selling fee...
tempting me and delivering distress,
dressed up dreams with beams of blinding sunlight,
caught in the glare bare with time ticking out
if only loneliness beat its own drum...
I`d sip the serenade as the days come.

Chris

No one hears the cries -- Chris

2010-03-13T04:21:00.000-08:00

No one hears the cries,
crawling like dark skies
through purples and blues,
and hating to choose...
thru dilemmas unfamilier to me,
mashing memories, nothing left to see
the replicas of men so far removed...
numb - bitten by frost of justice`s cool
soothe solely, by the souls ugly truth
manchild recruits, forever lost youth,
taunted by pride and replicated hate,
echoes crescendo and never abate...
The nightline battles, rattle my mind,
shackled by misfortune, preventing the climb.
Sniffles...muffled as footfalls retreat,
sunrise reflect, where morning dew sleeps
laying denied, hogtied in the dark
with all that`s part shark and a bit too sharp,
for ears...cause it`s clear my answers are here,
where echoes return, when -
no one hears the cries,
captured by nets inhibiting their rise
facing a fear, so clear to my ear
the years disappear, yet -
no one hears the cries,
crawling like dark skies,
pass purples and blues
and scars I can`t lose...

Chris

Picture

2010-03-11T07:22:00.000-08:00

My friend Harold with his kids...January 2010

A Poem? by Harold

2010-03-11T07:17:00.000-08:00

You walk a new path in your life
A path upon which you follow
in the footsteps of those who have gone ahead
How far will you go?
Where will it take you?
How long will this journey last?
Like you,
I feel the excitement of your adventure
for you see,
I walk with you in your shadow
Like our friendship, our love
may our journey last a lifetime

HL March 1, 2010

An outline of Harold`s letter, dated Nov. 11 2009

2009-11-18T08:34:00.000-08:00

It is now harder to get a good job if you are convicted of a felony. Working for yourself, as an independent contractor, etc. is ok, but so many reguire licenses that the goverment now denies to felons. I used to face that when I was released.
It doesn`t matter how long ago it was, what level of skills are, etc. You will not get a license, be bonded, get insurance, etc for certain occupations. Our government,
both States and Federal, went overboard. People who are economically underprivileged
suffer the most. There are ways to survive but that requirs compassion by another.
Most, not all, of the guards here, accept us as just people who made mistakes. That is true of the world at large unless the employer was a victim of a crime. Those are hard to find fault with but it^`s also a case of the whole being sanction because of a view.
Justice-for, besides death penalty advocates would you consider if you aren`t already, leading a fight to offer aid , to those who want to try but are hindered by labels of criminal, felon, offender, convict, that are placed upon them?
Education of our youth is key to the success of any program rehabilitating the adults is the struggle. Learned behaviour is so very hard to change, particulary when the induvidual doesn`t desire change.
Amnesty tackles humanitarian issues worldwide. Some issues are just too attrocious to mention. So many are based upon religious beliefs that rise out of peoples ignorance, even greed. Our ancient peoples sacrified others, especially virgins to appease one god or another. Today similar beliefs cause religious riots to maim, even kill, for their gods. Can we ever educate a planet whose ignorance and superstitions have prevailed since manking first appeared? Probably not since the do gooders..the christians themselves are often just as evil, if not more so than the pagans they wish to erudiate. If we cannot fnd a balance in religious beliefs, how will we ever help those that err through crime?
Society says I am evil, there fore they place me in a place that contains evildoers.
Am I evil? Perhaps.
I did an evil deed, driven by anger and years of persecution. Society, doesn`t care why things came about, only what actually happend. I admitted my defeat years ago and have resigned myself to my fate. Here I will survive if I continue to care about myself. You,A. are a big part of that caring, but thats another issue entirely. Despite the many medical labels placed upon me, I seek to better myself in ways I can. Reading is the primary source. I see so many hypnotised by television and trash shows, soapoperas, etc, others play games of skill, yet so few seek educational pursuits that even a good book can provide.
These same people, if they are ever released won`t have additional skills to survive in the world. They step out of here and right back into the ruts they were plucked from to begin with. So many have grown up in here and have no clue how to behave in society, or what is required to survive as a free person. For some individuals being a career prisoner is their fate. It sickens me to see how ignorant some are and how arrogant they are with that ignorance. The arrogance of ignorance!
Many, if released, have the skills needed to survive and stay out. These are often people who assault, kill, etc. The passion and anger dissapate over time. The ones who irk me so much are the ones who only see themselves. They act regardless of the consequences to others. They are incapable of caring, compassion, love, kindness or anything except greed and selfgratification. They respect no one, and probably can not spell the word respect.
Educate the youth of the world. Let the old orgiastic ndividuals die off without influencing anyone. It would be a massive undertaking to educate all societies. Eugenic ideas are often appealing in ways, if only they wouldn`t destroy individualism, races, cultures, or the world.
Most societies have monotheistic beliefs thy just cannot agree on which one fits all.
Amating when you consider it. God or Allah, two for the same thing - a belief.
There is always some group, neo-nazis etc. who disrupt the harmony.
Here, on this Unit, there is religious tolerance, simply because one group doesn`t try to sway the other. I actually applaud the muslems here, the serious ones for they are knowledge seekers. The "christians" are so close minded that it is laughable.
In spite of my rantings, inpite of all the effort of those who seek change, we as humans will not change us as a whole. Greed, powerseekers, racial tension will undue us once more. Human nature deems many to failure. History edducates that over and
over.
Is there hope for mankind? Will ther ever be true peace and harmony on earth? Not in our lifetime, not that of our children, but some day....

2009-11-09T04:01:00.000-08:00

Please look on the website www.justice-for.org and choose some inmates to send a christmas card....it would mean so much!! THANK YOU !!!

Using the dictionairy :-)) by Harold

2009-11-06T02:30:00.000-08:00

Finding myself bereft as though they have abnegated me completely, I find my state of ignoming esoteric at best.
What to do?
My chimerical whims, especially with you, bring succor to my austere extistence. By turning to the written word I am aable to emote that which lies within allowing palliation for my sorrow. Earlier while taking my sentimental journey through your chaste words of prose I now find them inculcated in my heart. Why am I here and not with you?
My opic behavior and my recusant frame of mind, addled by the chemical pollutants caused over sentience in my actions which brought about my bellicose behaviour over intentional slights against myself and child. Despite despotic claims, which lack sustenence, I froffer that I am just the opposite, although I do lack in suspiciousnedd. What I write may seem farcial in nature, even smarmy, it is neither, nor is it suggesting mirthlessness. It, this page, is an attempt at cogencyby hopefully, reguiring you to drag out your dictionary, as I did to discover what these various words define in thought and feeling.
These are but a few I write down during my literairy travels. Trying to use them, recalling their defination isn`t very easy without iculcating them daily.
Have fun, my love!! :-))

Harold Oct 24 2009

THE LIGHT OF LOVE by Andy Sawtell

2009-10-31T09:34:00.000-07:00

THE LIGHT OF LOVE

I love to watch the sunlight
as it shined throughout your hair
so shiny, long and lovely
that all other men just stare
I love to watch the sunlight
as it glistens on your lips
such tenderness and sweetness
no others can eclipse
I love to watch the sunlight
as it sparkles in your eyes
the windows to your heart and soul
show the love we can`t deny
I love to watch the sunlight
as it shows off all your curves
so beautiful your curves are
more than mortal man deserves
I love to watch the sunlight
as it kisses your sweet face
and as I watch my heart begins
to pound at a frantic pace
So you think I love the sunlight
well babe, that`s just the start
we`ve not yet covered how I feel
when the moonlight plays its part
fro now my love it`s time to go
so I`ll keep you in suspense
and when we finally get together
I`ll show you passion so immense
make love every single day
at least morning and night
if you want mmore, you`ll get it
sweet dreams my love, sleep tight

Andy Sawtell, Australia
31 Oct 2009

Free world really free? By H.Lee

2009-09-30T08:08:00.000-07:00

......It makes me wonder what is happening to our society, what I observe in here reflects in many ways what is going on in the so-called free world. are they really free?
I think not. The demands of society tie people down to a slave like existence, wages for most seldom cover the costs of home bills, insurance, etc. I recall how I used to juggle bills around. They were always paid, just not when they should be. Working overtime and extra jobs kept me in money for pleasure, rented movies, pizza`s, etc. I miss all that.
In here it seems like our existence has no purpose.
We are the pawns in forced labor and power struggles. Actually most - not all - but most of us are eager and willing to work and work hard. It, the work, gives us purpose and selfimportance. It keeps us busy. In an enviroment where most don`t care about the eguipment.
Things get torn up, damaged, even destroyed. That is where our livelyhood comes from, repairing the damage others have wrought. Very few repairs are from wear, most are from neglect and abuse. Out there and in here. There weren`t many that respected the property of another. I use this in the employee - employer sense.
Where I used to work, like here, people will abuse an item saying "They have the money to buy another!" Here that is a foolish statement, because its our taxes that pay for it. Us, our family and friends help to finance these places.......

Thoughts from H.Lee Sept 22, 09

FOR ENTERTAINMENT by HAROLD

2009-06-10T04:37:00.000-07:00

A piece out of Harolds letter today,

Today I began making a papermach spider and roach. Using coffee to color it, paper, headphone wire and shoestrings with a bit of water I have created busg that at first glance, look realistic. It will take a couple of days to dry, plus I have a few little minor things to do, add string etc. When I`m finished the fun shall begin! In the past my bugs have created laughter - always at someones expense but always in fun. It is good to laugh in here. What is real fun to see is the tatooed, musclebound badasses, the tough guys jump and holler over a bug!!
My spiders will look like adult Taranalas when I`m finished. The Roach is about 3" long and about 1" wide in the middle.
The things I do to entertain myself...

A RIDE WITH MY BIKE by HAROLD

2009-06-10T04:14:00.000-07:00

I remember it well, as if it vere just over
Instead of years ago
Check the tank, oil
Dust the seat
Straddle it, grasping the handlebars
Left boot puts up the kickstand
Standing there for a moment, anticipation
Fingers on the choke
Right foot giving slow kicks
Crack the throttle, hard kicks
A pop, kick again
It fires sluggishly
Less choke more throttle
It rumbles to life
Left hand clutch in
Left foot pushes down, first gear
Crack the throttle a few times
Feel the vibrations
The beast is alive again
Sitting back feeling the power
Clutch out, throttle twisted
Feet up, it moves
With a roar it`s gone
Clutch in, second gear
Third gear, fourth gear
The beast is on the prowl
Blastin` down the road
Feeling the wind, feeling free

CRAIG`S OPINION

2009-06-10T04:00:00.000-07:00

Today I received a letter from Craig where he asked me how my blog is..

"How are your blogs? I would like to be involved in it, but, have no idea on what to say?!"

Now I think I will ask him to write a bit about his study, that would be intresting cause it`s about a very urgent topic. Enviromental science is probably one of the most needed sciences in the future and as far as I noticed....it`s quite a bit to learn.
The last essay he had to write was about "Flooding" which happens more every year, we all know that. So hopefully I will be able to put in something of his work soon...

TWO POEMS by Harold

2009-06-04T07:02:00.000-07:00

So tired of living

Getting so tired of living

Yet that`s what I must do

Hard to take what life`s giving

I struggle to see this through

Each day is so different

Yet, each day remains the same

This is how I must repent

Part of an endless reality game

Enclosed by bars of steel

And walls like cliffs of stone

With no consideration of appeal

confined with many yet still alone

A world like no other

concealed from public view

To one another we claim brother

The truth of it speaks not but from a few

Made to work without a wage

No appreciation for my toil

doesn`t matter what the age

Rest will come when I`m in the soil

Till then I struggle to see this through

accepting what life is giving

It can be so very hard to do

When I get so tired of living.

*** *** *** ***

Sorceress

A sorceress you are with familiars three

Mystical Cat, Silent Bunny and Bushy Lady

Living in a cottage near the enchanted wood

Practicing magic wearing cloak and hood

What pray tell in your cauldron brew

A magic potion or delicious stew

Two young apprentices with you dwell

With visions of the world their heads do swell

Like witches of old you capture those astray

Enticing lost souls with words you play

Chants on paper, curious written rune

Evoking the power of sun and moon

Captured souls numbering now four

found in a magic box thru which you scour

Reaching round the world asunder

Four hearts begin beating like thunder

setting them free of that which does bind

Through understanding and compassion so kind

Lifting spirits higher than a cloud

You make one and all proud

Sorceress with familiars three

Having a friend like you is almost being free.

(Well, it`s close )

Proud to say that this second poem was written for me :-))

CRAIG

2009-06-03T12:23:00.000-07:00

As my Scottish friend isn`t quite such a poet and has no big drawing talents I just posted the flag of his nationality. Don`t want him to be forgotten just while he`s not an artist! :-))

Craig has become a very dear friend of mine over the past almost 3 years we know eachother now. He studies enviromental science in his time being in prison.

A FATHERS PAIN by Andy

2009-05-29T12:41:00.000-07:00

Front page of the newspaper, mother of five is dead
A single sided artcle, designed to be read
To create all kinds of sympathy, just because she was a mother
If only all the facts they knew, design may have been another
One that tells the cold hard truth, of a lot of father`s pain
And the constant nightmare battles, when custody we try to gain
From lots of "so-called" mothers, who wouldn`t have a clue
On how to raise our children, or the damage that they do
The ones` who are deceitful, vindictive and so cruel
The ones`who often "cry wolf", when there`s no wolf to be seen
Except the wolf who`s crying, and her hunger is quite keen
Boys in blue upon our doorstep, when nothing we`ve done wrong
But with lies and accusations, she makes her case quite strong
Then all relative authorities, she also gets on side
Another swag of stories, with them she does confide
Doing all her homework, to ensure her lies are straight
She then sets up a court date, to ensure the fathers fate
We have no leg to stand on, she`s done her homework well
Crossed "T`s" and dotted"I`s" and such, lies to the courts she`ll sell
Before a foot`s stepped in the courtroom, out of our childrens lives
But she`s not done with yet - Oh no, she`s still sharpening her knives
Care not her childrens safety, nor even for their health
Sets out to drain the father, of all his hard earned wealth
His cash is not for the children, she`s out for her own gain
Brags to friends of her achievement, no care for his or childrens pain
No childrens rights to speak of, father`s pain is quite severe
He seeks nothing but the best for them, and longs again to have them near
Mother`s too pre-occupied, in all her new found glory
By now convinced herself she has, of her own lie filled story
Father now severely struggling, to keep his heart and mind in check
His concern for his dear children , turning him into a wreck
So now you can begin to see, just how bad it really gets
And just some reasons as to why, a father for his children frets
By no means can this be all of it, as there is often so much more
And if you learned the worst of it, by God - you`d hit the floor
some cases so unthinkable, you wouldn`t want to know it all
But children have endured it, and fathers been played like a fool
So mother goes on merrily, while the father suffers on
And let`s not forget te children, who`s decent futures all but gone
You want worst case scenarios, now don`t you be mis-lead
A fair number of these cases end, when somebody is dead!!!

Andy, Australia

FAMILY AND FRIENDS by Andy

2009-05-29T12:24:00.000-07:00

There`s nothing as important as
Your family and friends
For it`s them who care about you
And on them you can depend
When you`re feeling down or times get tough
when things become uncertain
They`re always there to help you
Or support you when you`re hurtin`
It`s your family and friends
Who know the best how you work
And how you think and how you feel
And all your little quirks
It`s them who truly know you
And know what you are like
And others who profess to
Can get on their bloody bike
For they wouldn`t know the first thing
About what makes you tick
they rarely are around you
These people make me sick
Yes, it`s your family and friends
That you should value most
And your children, if you have any
To avoid seeming like a ghost
For now my friend, I`m almost done
But I`ll leave you with this thought
Beware those other people `cause
It`s you the`ll try to rort!!!

Andy, Australia

CARTOONS FROM HAROLD

2009-05-29T11:37:00.000-07:00

Although the quality isn`t that good you can see from the drawings how much he enjoys the letters he gets !!! Thats exactly why I`m or we`re doing this.

Sending some joy and sunshine and real life into the harsh life of prison.

MY PENPALS

2009-05-29T10:01:00.000-07:00

So let me tell you about my penpals and I sure hope some of you who will read this will tell me about theirs; I am fortunate to have 3 very dear friends.
Harold lives in the U.S. , Craig in Scotland and last but not least Andy in Australia.

Each of them know from the other which makes us a funny kind of family, one is a bit jealous, the other sure and strong.
Hope you will tell me how you came to your penpals....that really would get this blog started...

ORGANISATIONS FOR PENPALS

2009-05-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

There are a lot of organisations for prisoners, a lot of people who spend there time to find new penpals and who try to do their best on whatever legal work they can do for their friends.

Also they try to sell or get at least some intrest for the art, writings or poems of their friends.

I do to.

Anyway here I only give you two addresses of a Swiss and a German organisation.

www.lifespark.org

Lifespark is a Swiss organisation which works for inmates on Death Row.

They meet every so often and have a newspaper sent to their members to inform everyone over new happenings and discuss their experiences with their penpals.

The picture above, the quilt, is the invention of one of the members of Lifespark, I also sewed the names of my friends on a piece of fabric although they aren`t on Death Row. I sewed them both on a white background.

Karl and H.Lee.

www.justice-for.org

Justice for the innocent is a German organisation which actually works for inmates on Death Row and those who are livers. They really try to give every inmate a chance to sell and to publicate their work.

Both organisations have heaps of addresses of inmates who would love to write, just get in contact with them.

Ofcourse you could also scroll through the internet pages there are lots of sites for prison penpals

START OF THE BLOG , MAY 29

2009-05-29T04:43:00.000-07:00

Okay everyone, with this I start a blog for my hobby!!
I love writing and I love to have contact with people all over the world. As a young girl I already started a lot of penpal-friendships of which two survived... well, more or less. After 30 years !! And for about 3 years ago I started to write to prisoners, in the U.S., Scotland & Australia. Those penpals became very strong friendships, based on trust; without prejudice and judging.
I know a lot of people don`t or won`t understand what I, and many others, are doing and why we are doing it.
I hope on this way, with this blog, we can talk about it. Exchange our experiences, our adventures and our feelings towards a dear friend behind bars

The black&white pic I set up on this page is a childhood memory from one of my friends. It reminds everyone of the strange ways of live and the choices we make.

Angela